


Pucks Will Drop

by hockeygirlmaddy



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Penguins, Pittsburgh Penguins, Scat, geno - Freeform, human toilet, malkin - Freeform, pens, sid - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-31
Updated: 2019-03-07
Packaged: 2019-06-19 05:20:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15503193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hockeygirlmaddy/pseuds/hockeygirlmaddy
Summary: He gets "gifts" from Sullivan, Crosby, Malikn, Kessel, Guentzel, and Murray. Rated T for grotesque details.





	1. Sullivan's Salutation

"Tristan, you are officially transformed into the Pens' toilet, being that we obviously needed an upgrade to our plumbing!"  
In case if you didn't know, being that the Pens need to save up money, they have transformed Tristan Jarry into a human toilet, for efficiency.  
"You''ll do well, Tristan. You'll do well. In fact, I am more than happy to have a test run of you!"  
Mike undid his fly, and pulled out his dick from his undies.  
Tristan's thoughts of that dick were interrupted when a hot, yellow stream of piss poured into the bowl. The taste, was so salty and bitter. Yuck!  
"Take it all, Tristan. Drink my salty lemonade." His bladder kept emptying itself.  
"Every last, drop."  
Mike's stream slowed to a drip, and he shook off the lingering drop off his dick.  
"Yeaaaaah. Better!"  
Better for him, but not for Tristan.  
"Will, Trist, I'm gonna leave you with a few of your teammates, who are more than happy to test you out themselves too, in their own way!"  
Mike left.


	2. Crosby's Crap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Crazy.Disgusting.Funny. Sid the kid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> will pick up on later!

In the meantime,Tristan had time to ponder the inhuman fact that he is now...a LIVING TOILET! Of all the worse things to happen to a rookie-ish goalie like him, and THIS?!  
Tristan could do everything a human could do, except walk, of course. It wasn't going to be all fun and games for him now, for he heard the locker room door open, and approaching footsteps.  
"No! I'm not ready!"  
The footsteps emerged closer, until he could see two black running shoes. There was only one player that wore those, and it was...Sidney Crosby.  
"Wow", Tristan thought. "The first one, and it's Sid!"  
Sid unlatched the stall door, and presented to Harry his masculine form,then took off his bottom portion of clothing, whipping out his hard, heavy, thick manhood.Sid hummed as he lifted up the seat. More "salty lemonade".  
. Tristan tried to speak, but toilets can't talk! He just sat there, in his white, porcelain form, and drank Crosby' s piss. The taste, to him, was like a citric acid-y taste. It was more sour than salty, like Mike's. Jarry took in every last detail of Sid' s genitals, his testes swinging from side to side as he shook his pee off.  
"Please be done!", Tristan thought.  
Sid turned around, but instead of putting his pants back on and leaving, he sat down upon Jarry's seat with his firm, perfect ass.  
"No", he thought. "Please, don't--"  
His thoughts were rudely interrupted by a PLHLARRRP! ,then a squeaky flatulence, then the magic happened.Jarry witnessed Sidney' s anus spreading open with a grunt, and took note of the hole as an in incompetent void, that leads to a world of stomach-and-gut processed foods.  
."Please don't. Please don't!"  
Sadly, like I said, toilets don't talk, so Jarry had to take what was coming to him. Being that toilets cannot close their eyes, either, he took every detail of a pink pucker releasing a painful, bulky log out of Crosby' s system. Tristan metaphorically gasped in awe at the girth and length, but then whispered in fear as the end tapped upon his pool of water. As the shit was increasing in both bulk and length, if f waded deeper into the water, until it touched Tristan' s "tounge".  
"Eww! I hate my job already!"  
Tristan used his watery mouth to wrap the poo in his "tastebuds", so he could take in every flavor, every particle of protein and granola bar that was his favorite.  
"Uugh. Ick! You done yet?"


	3. Chapter 3

If you thought Crosby's dump was bad, you just wait. "Uuugh. She's all yours, G."

 _First Sid, now GENO?!,_ Tristan thought.  _Please let his dump be better. Pleeease let it be better!_

The Russian came into the stall as Crosby left, undoing his pants. 

 _Oh no._   _Please don't let it be as bad!_

Out whipped Geno's cock, about 10 inches, and 2 inches thick. 

_gulp!_

Geno took in a short breath through his teeth, and his member did the rest.

_"Ahhh. So good."_

Geno's hot, acrid piss instantly turned Tristan's water from clear to a dull yellow. When Tristan couldn't take it anymore, Geno finally finished.  _For now._

_Oh, please!_

Geno turned around, ass facing Jarry,

_No, no again!_

...planted his rump firmly on Tristan's "lips",

_At least let it be better than Crosby!_

,and his hole began to expand, inch by inch. 

"Ugggh. Mmmph! Hurts."

A long, hard *PHLARRRP!* shot out of his hole, only making Jarry hate his job more. Geno bent his head down, hands folded calmly. His stomach then gurgled, to which he replied:

_"Nnngh! Hot, hottt!"_

From Tristan's view, a ring of muscle went from nothing but darkness within it, to a textured, brown mass bulging through it.

_*Creeak! Crinnkle!*_

_Eww. Well, here goes._

"Uhh."  _*plunk!_ * "Ahhh."

_Oh noo, more disgusting shit! The worst part is, they have no idea it's me! They just think they're using a regular toilet!_

Then G's hole gaped wide open, as its owner muttered something pained, as Tristan could watch a smaller-sized log creeped out, and only landed with a non-climatic  _thud_ , as it added to the brown pile already covering up Jarry's mouth. 

_Soo, much! Can't take it all! G-gonna, clog!_

Geno growled, the hole now showing signs of its current wear, spattering out a final  _PHLARRRP!_ to top it off.When Tristan saw a hand reach for that glorious T.P. dispenser, he finally mentally sighed with relief. The neatly folded paper, now having G's remaining stuck-on waste on it, graced the Russian's pile, slowly seeping into the poo. As he got up, Tristan promptly swallowed whatever that Geno pushed out of him.  That hideous dump, not to mention  _huge,_ was making Jarry regretful. 

 _Could he at least get a break?!_  

Well, he did. As the silence of the room finally fell over him, Tristan just had enough time to gather all of his "thoughts", until his next client entered the bathroom. From the footsteps approaching him, it  _had_ to be someone young. 

_Now, let's see. Who's new to our team? Well, there's only one I've known that wears those same exact white sneakers. It's--_

The stall door unlocked with a  _ka-click!_. It was, just as he thought. The one and only, Jake Guentzel.

 


End file.
